Relationship Questions and Answers
Ex Is Jealous and Bossy

Ex Is Jealous and Bossy


Question

My ex keeps bothering me he says he doesn't want me back but still he's acting jealous and bossy over me. I've said it a thousand times that he needs to back off but it doesn't really seem to help. What can I do to make him get over it?

Answer

Thank you for sharing your situation. You can’t change how anyone behaves in a relationship (or when it’s over) but you can take care of yourself and let him know what you need. You might think about having as little contact as possible. If he asks you something answer as briefly as you can. Be friendly but be brief.

The thing to avoid is being drawn into a discussion or having to defend your point of view. If he talks to you, keep telling him what you need and move on. Make sure not to initiate any contact from your end. It’s also a good idea to tell people you trust that this is going on so that you’re not dealing with it alone. Behaviors such as jealousy and bossiness are red flags indicating the person has control issues and it’s a good idea to keep a healthy distance.

Some people don’t know how to deal with a break up. That doesn’t mean that you’re responsible for how they behave, they need to heal themselves. All you can do is remind him kindly of what you need. Remember to keep living your own great life along the way and treating yourself well.

Why Do People Cheat?

Why Do People Cheat?


Question

Why do people cheat, and what can be some motives for them to cheat?

Answer

Thank you for your questions. There are a lot of reasons and motives that lead people to cheat in a relationship including:

  • They don’t feel happy with themselves and need external validation.
  • They think they’ll find something better.
  • They’re not ready to commit.
  • They’re not happy with their current relationship.
  • The don’t feel loved.
  • They thrive on the thrill of the chase.
  • They don’t think they deserve to be loved.
  • They’re looking for love.
  • They don’t know how to communicate with their partner.
  • They’re trying to get back at someone.
  • They haven’t learned any other way to behave.

Every person has a different reason for cheating. The important thing is to make sure you’re the healthiest and most balanced person possible so that you attract people who don’t fit this profile.

The healthier and happier you are the more you’ll meet people who feel the same way about themselves and who practice positive behaviors. Remember that you deserve to be with people who are willing to commit to you and value who you are.

Rushed into a Relationship

Rushed into a Relationship

Question

I think I rushed into a relationship too quickly. I asked this girl to be my girlfriend and I've realized that I don't like her as much as I thought and it's slowly going downhill. What should I do?

Answer

Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s important for both people in a relationship to want to be with each other. You might find it helpful to take some time to think about what you really want to do and then talk calmly and kindly with her. The idea is to be gentle and compassionate and let the other person know what you’re thinking.

Keep it brief and friendly and make sure to listen to what she says as well. It’s up to you what you do next but please keep in mind to always treat the other person kindly. Remember that you both deserve to be in a relationship with someone who really wants to be with you.

He Shows Signs He’s Still Interested

He Shows Signs He’s Still Interested

Question

My boyfriend and I split up 9 months ago, we were together for 5 months but were best friends for 3 years. He split up with me and it took me ages to get over him because we lost our friendship too. He's always in and out of my life he still gets jealous over other boys and always shows me signs he's still interested. He says he misses me and that he'll never find anyone like me, but doesn't want a relationship yet. I'm so unsure of what I have to do or where to go from here. Is it worth the wait?

Answer

Thank you for sharing your situation. Going through a break up is difficult and some people have a hard time letting go. They may even go as far as waiting for the other person or staying involved just enough so that the other person doesn’t move on.

The idea in a healthy relationship is to be with someone who wants to spend time with you and is committed to being with you exclusively. That means that the person doesn’t stay in casual or occasional contact, they’re there for you and actively being part of your romantic life. Keep in mind that jealousy doesn’t qualify as committing to be with you.

You have a few options you might consider. One is to have some conversations with him where you ask him a lot of questions and listen closely so you can figure out what you want to do next. Another is to let go and find someone who genuinely wants to be with you. A third option is to take a breath, spend some time alone and discover how wonderful you are on your own.

Remember that you deserve to be with someone who is willing to commit to being in your life and treats you the way you want to be treated.

He’s Going Back to His Ex

He’s Going Back to His Ex

Question

I fell in love with my best friend. When he broke up with his girlfriend, he told me he wanted to be with me. At first I thought I was going to be a rebound so he could get over her, but he promised and swore I wasn't, telling me he had wanted me for months. We've been kind of seeing each other but now he's going back to his ex-girlfriend. Yet she talks about him behind his back about how she can't handle these moods he has. She's not good for him, and I love him. What should I do? Let him go?

Answer

Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s always a good idea to only try to have a relationship with someone who is completely available and ready to focus on you.

You have the answers inside you as to what you want to do. Perhaps you might do some thinking about what you want in a relationship and how you want to be treated. Ask yourself what’s working and what’s not about your current situation and what you can do to treat yourself well. Pay attention to what he’s done in the past, it’s likely to be how he acts in the future.

The idea is to make decisions that make you happy and help you move in a positive direction. Remember that you deserve to be with someone who genuinely loves you and is there for you all the time.