Relationship Questions and Answers

I Want to Break up with a Guy I Met on the Internet



Question

I have been with this guy I met on the Internet for a month and a half now. He was amazing at the beginning of the relationship but now he has gone distant and we never talk anymore. He can be so rude and horrible and over-protective to the extreme. This has caused me to become distant as well as being scared of him and his anger problems. I recently found another guy who is so nice and romantic but I don't know how to break up with my current boyfriend? How do I do this? I'm too scared.

Answer

Thank you for sharing your situation. Being angry, jealous, rude, over-protective or violent in any way are huge warning signs in a relationship. These behaviors can all lead to domestic violence.

A positive way to deal with a situation like this is to tell other people about it. You don’t have go through this alone. Ask people you trust for help and distance yourself from the situation as quickly as possible.

End the relationship in a straight-forward, non-confrontational way. If you’re not in contact then leave it that way. If you are, then you don’t have to say anything complicated or explain a lot. Just tell him that you’ve decided the relationship isn’t what you’re looking for. Don’t use the word “you,” just tell him in a neutral and calm way that you want to end the relationship. Keep it very brief. You don’t have to say anything else. Listen to him (if you’re talking on the phone) without reacting in any way and then move on when the conversation is over.

It’s a good idea to have someone with you when you talk with him and don’t hesitate to ask for help if you ever feel you’re in danger. You might also consider not doing it in person.

It’s really positive to listen to your inner voice, treat yourself well and surround yourself with nice people who treat you kindly. Please act as soon as possible. Anger can get worse the longer the relationship lasts. If you don’t have anyone to help you you can contact a resource like the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, thehotline.org for information on what you can do. You’re a valuable and important person so please take action immediately.



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