Relationship Questions and Answers
Forgiving and Forgetting Past Wrongdoings

Forgiving and Forgetting Past Wrongdoings



Question

Hi. I was just wondering if you could help me with my situation. How do I help my boyfriend in forgetting and forgiving me over my wrongdoings in the past?

Answer

Thank you for sharing your situation. One of the big lessons in any relationship is that you can’t do anything to change how people think or act, only they can do that.

The past is the past and we can’t do anything to change it. The only thing we can change is how we behave now. It’s up to your boyfriend to decide if he can deal with his own issues. It’s up to you to deal with yours.

You might find it beneficial to think about what kind of relationship you want and how you want to be treated. You deserve to be with someone who accepts you for who you are now.

Once you’ve thought about who you are and what you want you can talk calmly and kindly with your boyfriend and let him know. It’s OK to stand up for yourself and celebrate your positive behaviors. You can’t do anything about how he behaves but you can move your life in any direction you want.

You get to decide what kind of person you want in your life and keep in mind that it’s always a good idea to find someone who builds you up. Remember that you deserve to be with someone who values the real you and helps you feel great. You’re worth it.



He Hasn’t Called Yet

He Hasn’t Called Yet



Question

I was flirting with a staff member at the club and he said, "I can't wait to bump into you off the clock," (because he was working and worried he would get in trouble). So, I gave him my number and he kissed my hand. This happened Saturday and he has yet to call or text. Was he not really that interested or has he just not got around to getting in contact?

Answer

Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s hard to tell what anyone is thinking in a relationship without asking them. Perhaps you might think about what you want to know about him and then talking with him. It’s also beneficial to pay close attention to his behavior and decide if it matches how you want to be treated.

Keep in mind that it’s important to move forward slowly and get to know him well before you decide if he’s a good fit for you. That will help you take care of yourself and make positive decisions. Also keep in mind that if someone is really interested in you they will treat you with respect, want to spend time with you and follow up promptly because they value who you are. Their actions will also match their words.

Far from Being in Love with Him

Far from Being in Love with Him

Question

I'm currently in a relationship were my partner has already decided I am his all and he loves me. I've been in love before and know I'm very far from being in love with him. He knows this and we've talked about it, but I don't know what to do. His strong feelings are driving me away but I don't want to leave because of it.

Answer

Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s always a good idea to be clear and open with the other person in your relationship. That means letting them know how you feel in a kind and compassionate way. You might ask yourself a couple of questions to clarify what you want to do:

  • What does this person mean to me?
  • What’s my ideal relationship?
  • What do I want in a relationship?
  • What kind of relationship do I want with him?
  • What’s working for me, what’s not?
  • What is it about his strong feelings that is driving me away?
  • What would I tell him if I could and how would I do it?
  • What do I really want to do deep down inside?

The idea in life is to be in a relationship with someone who feels the same way about you that you do about them. Take some time to think carefully about what you want to do and remember that it’s better to be honest with someone than to drag something out and hurt them more later.

You might consider having a few more kind and calm conversations where you both tell each other what you think and feel and listen to each other without any interruptions or reactions. As you learn more about each other you’ll be able to make clearer decisions because you’ll have more information.

Remember that you deserve to be with someone who meets your needs and so does he.

He Won’t Believe Me

He Won’t Believe Me

Question

How do I prove to a guy that I really want to be with him? He won't believe me no matter what I say. I need actions to speak for me and it's got to be big because I've hurt this guy before.

Answer

Thank you for sharing your situation. You can’t control how other people behave but you can control what you do. When someone has been hurt in a relationship it’s up to them to decide when and if they want to continue being with the other person. It’s natural for people to want to spend time to think about things and take care of themselves when something negative has happened.

You might consider just letting him know how you feel and that you’re there for him. You don’t have to say anything complicated or long, just let him know how you feel inside and keep it brief.

Then let go and live the best life you can live. Be a wonderful person and behave in positive ways. Figure out what you would do differently in the future. Pay some attention to who you want to be and what you need to grow and succeed. Treat yourself well and build yourself up.

The idea is to just live your life in a constructive way. If he decides to come back into your life he will. If not, you’ll still be living a positive life. Remember that you deserve to be in relationship where you both treat each other well.

How Can I Show My Boyfriend I Love Him?

How Can I Show My Boyfriend I Love Him?

Question

How can I show my boyfriend that I love him?

Answer

Thank you for your question. There are many ways to show someone you love them including:

  • Spending time with them.
  • Telling them you love them.
  • Doing nice things for them.
  • Making them something.
  • Doing fun things together.
  • Giving them a hug.
  • Writing a poem about how you feel.
  • Having deep conversations where you listen to them.
  • Saying positive things about them.

It’s up to you to decide how you show love. Just be yourself and don’t worry about having to be perfect or doing certain things. Do what you’re comfortable with and stay away from doing things that don’t feel right to you.

The key is to be you and don’t forget to expect him to love you as well.